Wednesday, March 31, 2021

The Witch of Woodland Valley

Good afternoon, MMers! With summer rapidly approaching and the weather improving, we wanted to take some time to warn you about potential harm found in a seemingly safe hobby. As you may know, there is a disc golf course in Limerick called Woodland Valley Disc Golf. You may have even played a round there yourself at some point in time. However, what you didn't know is that there is an evil spirit that haunts the grounds. If you've ever played there, you may have experienced a chill crawling up your spine around the sixth hole on the Grizzly Bear course. The hollowed out tree that marks the hole? Well, that's not there by accident. 

Back in the early 1690s, long before Maine was granted statehood, a woman named Isabelle Houser was arrested, and later convicted, for practicing witchcraft. It was said that she used her powers to lure young boys and girls out into the woods, pierce their ankles with rusty nails, hang them from a tree, and slowly drain the blood and life force out of them until they expired. Many believed that this was Isabelle's way of staying young, as she was 102 years old according to local records, but she didn't appear to be a day over 70. Once she was convicted and found guilty of witchcraft, murder, and other unmentionables, it was decided that she herself should hang from the same tree she had drained so many children from. So, the noose was readied, and Houser was hanged until death. The locals decided to not bother taking her body down afterwards, as she "deserved to rot" for what she had done. Six days after Houser's hanging, the middle of the tree seemingly imploded on itself, leaving only the hollowed out trunk that exists now. Interestingly enough, the tree hasn't changed shape since those days. Some say that it has an impenetrable hex that can never be removed. 

After her death, there were numerous reports of strange activity in those woods. Some reported hearing cackling in the distance, others heard the cries of desperate children. If you got close enough, you might even be able to smell, even see, the fresh blood of innocent children dripping down the tree's bark. 

Britney Bernard in the Hollowed Tree
In recent years since the disc golf course's opening on those "hollowed" grounds, a trend has started in which players pose in the hollowed tree for a photo opportunity. In 2017 a local, Britney Bernard posted a picture to her Instagram of her posing in the infamous tree. Britney was found dead six days later, cause unknown. We tell you this today, MMers, to warn you while you are out in those woods. If you hear a strange noise, smell the scent of freshly spilled blood, or even feel something brush against your shoulder, you should pick up your disc and leave the grounds before it is too late. Stay safe out there, Maine! 



Monday, March 22, 2021

The Town That Wasn't There

Here's one right from the horse's mouth, MMers. Tom and Chris, two of our lead investigators here at Malevolent Maine, recently experienced a little firsthand unexplained phenomena of their own. They were driving to investigate  a claim about a so-called "witch tree" in Limerick (check back soon for the complete story). They were traveling along Route 5 when they saw signs indicating a town up ahead.

The map clearly shows no suck town exists.

"We're pretty familiar with the area," Tom said. "So the sign - you know one of those green signs that indicates the miles to the different towns - had a name we'd never seen before."

The sign indicated a town in between Waterboro and Limerick called Wilton Hills. This wasn't a town either of them had ever heard of before, and so they took a slight detour, following the signs that led them to this town.

"To be clear," Chris said. "This town is not on any map of Maine. Now, maybe that's not that unusual a little farther north or for those tiny little towns of only a handful of people, but this wasn't the case for us. This was a town that did not exist - could not exist - and yet, we were pulling up to their main street, just as real as the day." 

Our intrepid investigators found a thriving little town similar in size to say downtown Saco. There was a general store, diners, a barbershop.. They passed an elementary school, a fire department, pawn shop. You name it, the town seemed to have.

"It was quaint," Tom said. "Like the kind of little downtown you'd see in a movie or tv show."

The two got out and walked around for a bit. "We talked to some people on the street, just as normal as could be." They even went into a local coffee shop and got some java and a bagel. "The food was real. It tasted just fine," Chris said. "It was real good, actually."

Shocked and surprised by the town that had seemingly sprung up out of nowhere, the two made sure to take a lot of pictures.

So after an hour or two of exploring the town, Tom and Chris continued to Limerick and completed their investigation there. On the drive they discussed this little town they had never heard of and where it could have come from. On their way home, they decided to stop in again and grab a late dinner.

Much to their surprise, they could not find the town. Any trace of it, including signs, mile markers, landmarks, and anything associated with Wilton Hills just no longer existed.

"It doesn't make any sense," Tom said. "We know that. But we were in that town. We walked around, we ate, we talked to people. I don't understand how it could just disappear like that. And I investigate stuff like this for a living!"

There are no historical records of a town named Wilton Hills appearing anywhere in that area. There is a Wilton, Maine, but that is located in Franklin County, no where near where our boys were. What that town was and where it came from cannot be explained. Both investigators agree that it was a nice little town, and they hope to get back there someday.

Stay safe out there, Maine.

Tuesday, March 16, 2021

Black Dog of the Woods

Attention Malevolent Mainers, this one is serious. A report has come in from a MMer who goes by Greg, that he just narrowly escaped a malevolent entity. This man was driving on I-95 near a long stretch of thick woods when he noticed a large black dog getting dangerously close to the road. He pulled over and approached the animal which seemed friendly. The dog barked and moved towards the woods, often looking back at the man, as if to get him to follow. The man worried that the dog's owner might be in some danger followed the dog into the woods. The dog led the man deeper and deeper in, constantly looking back at him, his tongue lolling out of his head.

When Greg became worried that they hadn't found the owner after ten minutes he began to turn around and head back towards the road. As the dog noticed him turning to leave it began growling, Greg immediately back toward the highway and the dog chased him. Greg just barely made it back to his truck as the dog began tearing at his pant leg. He escaped narrowly with only slight injuries. As he looked in his rearview mirror he saw the dog's demeanor change once again from vicious to friendly as it went back to the side of the highway to wait once more.

If you see a black dog on the side of the road and you have the urge to help it or look for its owner, please use extreme caution. Before you get too far from your car, turn around and see if the dog reacts, if it does leave immediately, if it doesn't feel free to continue following the dog.

Stay safe out there, Maine!

Photo of a similar dog sighting from the late 1970's

Thursday, March 11, 2021

Cinema Nocturna

Okay, MMers, this one is weird even by our standards. It comes to us from a reader named Chen from Biddeford. He told us about a secret movie theatre somewhere in Biddeford or Saco that shows rather, odd arthouse films. 

Downtown Biddeford, ME
The way Chen tells it,  he had a buddy, Abraham were out drinking in Biddeford. They had gone to a few bars and sometime between 11 pm and midnight, the two found themselves walking to their next destination. 

"To be honest, I'm not really sure where we were. We were somewhere around the bridge, but we'd had a few and everything got a little blurry after that. We stumbled around for a bit, down some side streets. There's all these old brick buildings that have been turned into cafes and shops and stuff."

Chen and Abraham found themselves outside of a brick building with no windows and a dark purple awning. There were steps that led down to a thick metal door with a wire mesh window in the door.

"I remember it because that cover over the door. It was purple - like a real dark purple - and I don't think I'd ever seen something like that before."

Thinking it was another bar, maybe one of the speakeasies that have opened in a lot of southern Maine cities, the friends went down to the stairs and knocked on the door. They saw a pair of eyes peer out at them from the window for a second, and then the door opened.

According to Chen a tall, thin man dressed in a tuxedo stood in the doorway, holding a lit candle. "It was an old style tux. He looked like something out of a Tim Burton movie." The man's face was pale and thin, with deep shadows beneath his eyes. "He told us he had been waiting for us and was glad we had arrived."

Artist's rendition

The man ushered Chen and Abraham into a hallway and then into a room. At first, they couldn't see anything because it was so dark. "But as our eyes adjusted we saw that it was like a movie theatre. It was small, maybe not much bigger than like a classroom or something. There were old wooden seats set up in rows and we could there were people scattered around the room, sitting in small groups of twos and threes."

The patrons all seemed to be wearing black or dark clothes and we staring up at a blank, dark screen. The tall man ushered Chen and Abraham to some empty seats and told them to get ready for the show. He was back a moment later, offering the men glasses of what appeared to be wine.

"We were looking to hit up one last bar, but we found this little artsy movie theatre. We were just drunk enough to think this whole thing was pretty funny, and besides, we got some free wine. It was pretty bitter and didn't taste like any wine I'd ever had, but we thought whatever, right?"

All of a sudden the light on the projector came on and the room was filled with a pale light. The tall, thin man was standing in front of the screen.

"Welcome to the cinema nocturna!" the man said. "We are ever so glad you could make it. What you are about to see is an original creation. I hope it will grab you as it grabbed me."

Then he clapped his hands twice. The theatre went dark for a second and then the movie began.

Chen described the film to us.

"There were all of these creepy images."


"It was black and white. It was a bunch of random shots. Like, there was a a shot of a fox slinking through the woods. There was another one, like one of those time-lapse shots of a mountain like crumbling or eroding or whatever. There were lots of real random stuff. I remember there was a skull. There was a fire that died down, and then I think they reversed the video and it sprang back to life. I can't remember a lot of it. But there was this awful music playing. Like screeching violins kind of. Maybe some sort of weird flutes. And, here's the crazy thing, that music sounded like it was coming from inside the room. There wasn't a band or anything, but it sounded like it was right next to me."

Chen began to feel dizzy. Maybe it was the alcohol or the film or some combination of the two, but he started to feel sick. "My head was swimming. I felt like I was outside of my body, but also deeper inside than I had ever been. It was like... like being high, but not in a good way. Not going to lie, I started to get pretty freaked out."

Chen looked around, but everyone else seemed entranced with the film. He tried to get Abraham's attention, but his friend stayed focused on the movie. "I remember looking down at the wine glass and it looked like... it looked like blood. I pout it down on the chair beside me and stood up."

Chen told Abraham he was going to be sick and he needed some fresh air. His friend made some noncommittal response, and then Chen lurched away. He thinks he remembers seeing the tall man staring at him questioningly, but he admits that could have been a false memory. He staggered his way out of the cinema as the images continued to flash on the screen and the music kept blaring.

"The images were getting more and more disturbing. And that music just drilled down into my brain."

Finally after what felt like a long time, Chen crashed through the door and up the steps. He leaned against the cold brick building and breathed in the fresh night air.

"I don't know how long I was out there. I must have passed out or fallen asleep, because the next thing I knew it was morning."

But here's the real kicker, MMers, the brick building with the purple awning was gone. Chen was in an alley behind a coffee shop and a law firm. 

"I figured maybe I just wandered off. Like I said I was pretty drunk. But I've gone all over Biddeford and Saco looking for that building. It's a purple awning, right? How hard should that be to find? I can't find it anywhere. It's like it never existed. I've asked everyone I can about that place and no one has ever heard of the theatre or the cinema nocturna."

As for Abraham, no one has seen him since the night they wandered into the movie theatre. There's security footage of Chen and Abraham walking out of a bar at 11:17. Street cameras have them walking up Main Street. They turn off onto a side street, and that's the last anyone has seen of Abraham. At the time of this writing Chen has been cleared as a suspect, but the whereabouts of his friend is unknown. If you have any information about Abraham Baldwin, please contact the Maine State Police.

Abraham Baldwin, missing since May 16, 2020

We asked around and we have heard some rumors of an underground theatre, the cinema nocturna, popping up in other towns. Westbrook, Auburn, and Bangor have all had unconfirmed sightings of the underground arthouse. Several witnesses remember the tall, thin man, and one person, who wished to remain anonymous, experienced similar symptoms as Chen. Who or what this obscure theatre is and what its true purpose is, remains unknown at this time.

Stay safe out there, Maine. 

Thursday, March 4, 2021

My Great Aunt Married a Ghost

We've got a real weird one for you, MMers, so hold on. Shelly Macintosh, a college student out of Westbrook, tells the story of her great aunt, who she claims married an actual ghost!

The woman in question, Mary Kaminski, was a spinster well into her fifties, according to her great-niece Shelly. "She was always a bit of a homebody, if you know what I mean. She liked cats, jigsaw puzzles, that sort of thing. Super nice, though."

As Shelly tells it, Mary met a man who moved into the apartment across the hall from hers. "He was older, maybe seventy, seventy-five. Pretty old school, but still a nice guy. We all thought it was cute he and Mary were dating."

The couple was soon married and moved in together. For a few years things were great. Mary and her husband, a man named Donald Warren, were happy. It was like a breath of fresh air for the couple. "They both seem reinvigorated, full of life," Shelly told us. "It was great!"

But then things started to change. "I noticed that Don always walked about the war and his experiences," Shelly continued. Don would tell stories of practicing with live ammunition and that his friend William Corbell jumped up too soon and was shot in the head. He used terms that were outdated, that didn't seem to be a part of the modern world.

"At first, I thought he was just an old man, you know?" Shelly told us. "Like he came from a different generation. You know it's not right, but sometimes you just have to accept that he's stuck in his ways. You know what I'm saying?"

It wasn't until Don mentioned the Battle of Blackburn's Ford that Shelly began to seriously question. "It didn't sound like a World War II battle or Korea, or Vietnam or whatever. So I did a little research and I found  that Blackburn's Ford was a Civil War battle in Virginia. Well, I thought that was odd, so I did a little more research."

It turns out that the 113th Infantry Unit from Maine, under the leadership of one General James A. Cluthcher took part in that battle. It was a bit of a rout by the Confederate troops, and many of the Maine brigade perished in the battle. 

Including one Private Donald M. Warren.

"My first thought was, okay this is weird. Maybe it was like an ancestor of his," Shelly said. "Then I googled a few more things and I found the story about his friend William Corbell getting shot during a training exercise, and suddenly the pieces started coming together."

The outdated manner of speaking, the hatred for Southern States, his stories of a nebulous war that sounded nothing like modern warfare. Shelly was convinced he was a ghost. The real kicker was when she found a picture of Private Donald Warren and compared it to one of the man who had married her great aunt.

Donald Warren, 2020

Private Donald M. Warren, 1861

"I was scared," Shelly admitted. "So i burned some sage and doing some reading on the internet, I found a... not a spell, I guess, but a ritual? I don't know what the right word is, but it was to cleanse the spirits of the lingering dead. I went over to Mary's house one day when I knew her and Don were out and I said the words I printed off the website. I left the little charms and symbols it told me to draw."

Shelly never saw Don again. According to Mary he disappeared one night while she was asleep. It was as if he had never been there at all. Mary became depressed and after a few months, just a few days shy of her sixty-third birthday, she passed away in her sleep. Shelly suspects it was from a broken heart.

"She really loved that guy, and I guess he really loved her. I know he was a Civil War ghost or whatever, but maybe I shouldn't have intervened. Maybe I should have just let them be happy. Wherever we go when we die, I hope they're together."

Stay safe out there, Maine!


The Meat Suit Man

Welcome back, MMers! It has been  LONG time coming, and before we dive into today's story, we feel we owe you guys a bit of an explanati...